Destination Publication: Post #03 - Thomas brother #2 (Leyton & Angelica's story) - progress report, writing goals & editing update - Crisis!

Last Week's Goal 

A1.1 Write a synopsis for the novella. Done

A1.2 Work through Writing Tools by Clark - Part Three. Ideally it's one chapter a day but some chapters are non-applicable or offer me little value at this stage of editing. So 16 chapters will give me 16 days and I'm aiming for 7 chapters - note it could be less. Completed

A1.2 Read HL's next editing lesson  week 14.  Completed

How did last week (of 28th April 2019) goals go 

The synopsis has spoilers in it so that's why I'm not posting it. After I'd posted it, I recalled I was doing a shorter synopsis before but those were more like blurbs. This time I did a synopsis from both character's viewpoint  and storylines. Mostly because though Angelica has the main story driving this book, Leyton's story is the overarching story for the serie, since it's more or less to do with the series.

Writing Tools by Clark was good so I'll have to look at what parts I can put into my editing. Holly Lisle's lesson plan was great in some respects.

Going Forward - Crisis. Frustration boils over! 

I'm frustrated. I'm just frustrated with the entire process. If I could quit and walk away, I would. I'm just tired and fed up. Really! Yes there has been some progress but I'm paying a lot of money for a course and frankly, it's not delivering - maybe I need to hold out to end and see. But I'm tired of thinking things will get better. I'm tired of thinking it's what I'm not doing. I'm tired of looking for excuses for why its not working. As you know for every course, it will work for at least 10%, and have amazing results for1% of that 10%.  But for the other 90%, well some of us would work it and think it's our own fault why it isn't working, and some of us will drop out. Just saying. I'm fed up of being optimistic when I feel I'm on a sinking ship!

I wanted to come out all cheerful and happy with a whole load of new goals but I can't. What is the point of pretending? And yes, I got this week's lesson but it's something I could get from a book. Anyway at least I tired it so I'll no longer be curious the course and maybe it will get better.

Also it's not like there is any money in self-publishing for me. There isn't really because publishing is a business based on markets, and I don't write for markets. I do my own thing and that is at a big financial cost. Yes, if you don't write for the market, you lose money - books don't sell. However chasing the market makes into another job with rules and expectations and restrictions - oh don't do that it won't sell, or this is not what people want to read. 

I'm the little artist who writes because it's what I do, what I feel. I don't go querying because they don't understand my characters or the story. Also my genre is very niche and only one main publisher deals with it, then rest are small independent. Don't mind me, I'm just whining/whingeing here.  

Possible Options

1 Continue as the planned on the HL course. I've been writing since I was kid, being taking courses on and off from my early twenties over the last decade or so so I kinda know when something is not working for me. As I said it may come together in the end but I doubt I'll meet my target time.

2. Enrol for the Jericho editing course in September and  delay publication until 2020 - this will cost me about $800 give or take...It's six-week course and I've heard very good things about it. I've also attended a session by one of the tutors. I've wanted to try this course for about five years.

3. Enrol on an expensive off-line course in October, and delay publication until 2020. It's a premium supplier and I get to attend a class - meets others and drink lots of tea and coffee (hopefully included looking at the price). I'm dyslexic so that helps as it also is more motivating in a way. I'm not interested in publishing or finding an agent but it look good. This is a select course, so I'll need to apply therefore there is no guarantee of even getting a place. It's super expensive but I've know about it for years as well. These courses always look like the path to the holy grail but I've find classroom approaches productive in the past.

4. Start again. Make a new editing plan from looking at these course outlines, and try and self-instruct my way through using 'how to' editing books. Demotivating as it feels like so many false starts, too many. I've been working on this since December last year. Yes, I do have editing books, I think I showed my James Scott Bell editing one but I alway stall after a while. It's like some of Holly's lessons, packed with greatness but difficult for someone like me to apply.

5. Take a break.

6.  Do nothing. Quit.  Walk away.  Always an option.

Editing/writing goals for week -  5 May 2019

• I need to rethink the options.