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Weekly update. Verdict on Check It movie, lack of black male role models and normal boring stuff. Oh and I'm still fat.

Hello everyone!

So new focus. Yes, I never know what to write about. Never know what’s interesting so I’m just going to write for myself…if that makes sense. There are slew of blogs trying to change the world, radicalise the world, and revolutionise the world so I’m not doing that here. Not am I going to think - oh will people find this interesting or boring. To be frank, I’m a pretty boring person but hey ho let me write.

 I’m thinking of changing my gym. Well right now I’m a member of Virgin Active Health Club which styles itself as a life style gym, and to be honest the only thing I use is the hot tub, sauna and steam room. In the three years I’ve been a member, I’ve only been in the gym about ten times, gone for two classes - they are always fully book so I only really just use the hydro-pool/spa, and steam room. I’m a member of the Islington Angel branch which is were all the posh liberals are.  This is a picture of the spa, and pool. The pool can be a bit chill at times.

picture of virgin active pool

 I don’t go that frequently and today I found out they changed jet pipes in my favourite part of the hydro-pool - it's by the pillar.  There is a part where it bubbles up like a Jacuzzi so you feel like you are bathing in a glass of champagne. Very luxuisous and worth the extra premium Now I’m thinking of down grading to a cheaper gym. Well not that much cheaper because it’s still within the area.

However they don't have a hot tub. I’m pretty honest here - not having a hot tub may be a deal breaker. I’m a fat person so even if I join a gym with the best intentions, I normally become a spa facilities person. Yeah, I may go the gym to exercise for a month but eventually, I’ll just be hot-tubbing and steam-rooming it.

 I watched a film called Check It ( about some black gay gang banging kids in America. I’m not sure what to make of it - it's a GREAT FILM. A really good movie- I just didn't know what to make of it. It was poignant in a way but there was not real concrete ending, so I just hope the kids made good out of this film. I wasn’t impressed by the ending - it was wrapped up in a bow but you could see nowt had really changed for some of the boys.

It's does romanctise the whole gay gangbanging movement in way but gangs are gangs and some of these kids may end up jail or dead. Some of the stuff is deep. Kids - minors are on the game, street walking to buy clothes and shoes. WTF...I don't know. I don't. It makes me feel helpless at times when I see minors - I mean  REAL MINORS - not your 17/18 years old. UNDERAGED kids on the game. Not sure if it was real or for the movie. But it was scary.

So of the kids managed to get breaks from this show but changing your life. It ain’t easy. It’s not easy. Even if you are give opportunities - it still take hard work and discipline to grab them and make good use of them. So I’m not sure.
However I suddenly understood why black male role models were needed. Why there is so much about the break down of the black family and lack of male role models or father figures. I understood the consequences of these kids having no fathers in their lives, and where the mothers could not cope. Kids teaching kids, kids protecting kids, kids fending for themselves. It makes me feel like an activist. This is real stuff. It's real.

Maybe they need to teach parenting classes in high school. We may talk shit about gender equality but black community in poor neighbourhoods are suffering from the lack of black men who will take responsibility and raise their children in a manner that will prepare them for society.

 I watched the movie, and several times, a kid would threw an opportunity away. They would mess it up. And it was wow! Really? It really came down to a lack of discipline and boundaries - maybe a lack of socialisation skills. Discipline and social skills those of us who grew up in more stable environments took for granted.

Discipline, social skills and perseverance our parents or guardians taught us. We may have fought against that discipline, perseverance and boundaries when we were younger but we could fall back on them, and use those skills to pass exams, get jobs and succeed in life. There was one who was a talented althele but he just couldn’t apply himself long term. That was such a pity. He had talent. Real talent - but discipline, commitment and perseverance wasn’t there. Also the drive to succeed.  I don’t know. I just don’t know.

You may say Bigga you're fat and you're talking about these kids not having discipline, commitment and perseverance - but geez, I’m  a lot older, degreed up, a chartered associate and I managed an eight figure budget. I’m allowed to be freaking fat. And when I was their age, I was preparing for college.

I don't know the answer.  That was my weekend.

List of resources for vulnerable kids in DC or  US


Wanda Alston House is solely dedicated to offering pre-independent living and support services to homeless or at-risk gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth ages 16-24 in all 8 wards of the District of Columbia.

CASA RUBY Casa Ruby is the first Multicultural community, social and resources center run by LGBT queer, gender nonconforming, trans people in Washington, D.C., Maryland, Virginia and Delaware. Casa Ruby is the only Bilingual Multicultural LGBT Organization providing life-saving services and programs for the most vulnerable.

Sasha Bruce helps young people find safe homes, achieve and maintain good physical and mental health, create and strengthen supportive and stable families, and explore opportunities in education and careers.

THE DC OFFICE OF HUMAN RIGHTS (OHR) A District government agency that mediates and investigates complaints of discrimination and works to prevent discrimination from occurring. OHR also houses the Citywide Bullying Prevention Program that actively works with school administrators and families to help address and provide support services to all those involved. Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior that causes
significant harm to the target and involves a real or perceived power imbalance.


WHITMAN WALKER YOUTH SERVICES Provides health-related services to youth ages 13 to 24.
DRUGREHAB.COM helps individuals suffering from substance use disorders find the help needed to begin their road to recovery. For DC resources, click here.
 HIPS promotes the health, rights and dignity of individuals and communities impacted by sexual exchange and/or drug use due to choice, coercion, or circumstance. HIPS provides compassionate harm reduction services, advocacy and community engagement that is respectful, non-judgmental, and affirms and honors individual power and agency.


The LGBT Liaision Unit is building trust between the Metropolitan Police Department and the LGBTQ community. For info please contact: Jessica Hawkins, Sergeant MPD 202-669-1139.

MYAL.ORG SMYAL started in 1984, when local youth service professionals and community activists organized a conference on lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) youth issues.

The Mayor’s Office of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Affairs 

Happy week!



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